I Don’t Know If I Died…

But….

I was living in University City in St Louis before I was to be married. I sat up on my mattress, which I had on the floor; I was a bachelor, what can I say? I propped myself up to meditate on a warm and sunny morning. Early summer had arrived, and I love warm sunny mornings.

I closed my eyes and enjoyed the warm breezes wafting through the bedroom and the smells of summer that the breezes brought with them. I began my Mantra effortlessly, as I was taught to do. I am not a spiritual person by any means, nor do I follow any teachings by any guru’s. If anything, I love the cosmos and I am enthralled with String Theory. The closest I have been to spirituality is reading ‘Pale Blue Dot’ by Dr Carl Sagan, or in the later years of 1990’s is ‘The Elegant Universe’ by Dr Brian Greene.

I Just Closed My Eyes and Saw Light

I don’t remember feeling any sensations beyond the normal human senses that anyone normally feels. I wasn’t sweating, my breathing was normal and if I had my blood pressure taken during this time it would have been normal. This was my time to enjoy some quiet time and peace of mind.

No, I didn’t lift out of my body and see it from above. If anything, I believe I transcended beyond my body, to a source of everything. Yeah, you read that right. Transcended to a source of all. This is what I remember:

I was Light, not in a body. There was Light all around, in every conceivable direction; Though there was no sense of direction but everything, everywhere, at once.

I was singular, but I was everything. If I thought it, or brought it to my awareness, I could be anywhere in this light in an instant with just a thought. Effortlessly. In fact I was not thinking at all, I was Being.

There was no one else. I was one but connected to all. A sentient being. No human forms, just light. I was connected to the light and I was the light.

I knew everything about everything, but I didn’t have to know it all. As it was there in my awareness and at my beckon. I just had to think it, or rather have it in my awareness.

It was a beautiful. I was contented to remain. Then I was aware of myself in my human body again. The time I experienced lasted forever, but once in my body, if I had left it at all, the time was brief. I only meditate for twenty to thirty minutes, that’s all I need to ready myself for my day ahead.

I wish I could experience it again

This experience happened in the mid 1990’s. I have talked to others about this and I get two reactions. The most reliable reaction I get is a weird look and something about hallucinating and a reference about drugs, or dreaming about my experience while sleeping, or something along these lines. The other reaction is people telling me about their own similar experience.

Now I don’t fear death. I think I know what happens based on my experience. It seems the most logical explanation to me. We can create again and again for all eternity, it is happening continuously everywhere on Earth and in the cosmos. Maybe this is why I love life in this body, even though I have had it as rough as the next person, or less than some who are shit upon daily. I really wish people would show more compassion to all people and assist those who are having a real hard life. I know that when we die, there is a beautiful place, a realm, a heaven. Whatever you want to call it, we are all light.

Heathen! You Weirdo!!

You don’t have to believe this, you can mock it, or call out me as a blasphemer. It is your choice, you know where you are coming from based on your own life experience. I know what I experienced and I simply thought I would put it into words for those of you who ponder the question, ‘What is there beyond life on earth, if there is anything at all?’

This is my experience and you can make whatever you want of it, for as long as you need.

What we experience in our life time, in these bodies, on this planet, …just know that we are more than this. So. Much. More. Than. This.

Live a happy life and be good to all living things.